The Koha Herd are pleased to announce the release of Koha 7287.12.2; our most advanced release yet. It is so good we had to jump from 3.6.4 to 7287.12.2 in one release.
To make it webscale and cloud ready, respecting both the nimbus and cumulus standards we rewrote everything in aspx, which we then pre compiled into cobol. We also decided to replace the RDBMS layer with Oracle and sqlite. This has the side effect of needing 872 GB of HD to install, but we feel the lack in performance, flexibility and loss of freedom is well worth it to be buzzword compliant.
Kōrerorero 
Koha 7287.12.2 could only have been achieved by an exciting new development methodology, one inspired by one of the great American architect Frank Lloyd Wright most famous creations. We should all be proud that the requirements were revised a mere 2,745,408 times.
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Congratulations! I assume that the Oracle database will be Base64 encoded and stored in a text column inside the Sqlite database, enabling a powerful versioning approach of inserting updated versions in subsequent rows?
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It should be noted that neither the Newbie Guide nor the proper Manual were necessary. Instead, Nicole has communicated telepathically with prospective users imbuing them with her knowledge. The Newbie Guide has now been geared towards Elitist Jerks, and the singular rule of the Community has been changed to “Be a Huge Dick.”
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